STUDENT & TEACHER......
I wrote something the other day about denial. It's so insidious, & powerful. It interferes with my making healthy choices. My pride will defend my denial until the death, until I'm faced with death, or insanity, During this insanity, I have no clue what's going on, someone usually makes me aware of it. I just don't see it myself. This also goes for letting go of something. I try to help, but my help is not wanted, or encouraged at all. I usually offer a challenge. That is mostly how I've learned, from challenge, usually from my friends, who I know have my best interest at heart. I've hit enough road blocks, that cause me pain, due to my ego, & pride, or denial, that I listen now, I have an open mind. That wasn't always the case, I've had to learn, like most of us, the hard way. This saves me alot of anguish, & having to go back & make amends, as well as admit the person was right. Alcoholics in denial, & ego, are maddening. I'd just as soon not deal with them. Aren't we s'pose to share our experience, strength, & hope? Aren't we s'pose to carry the AA message? I've encountered some people that don't want to hear it. Then I get pissed, well, that's no good. I'll stick with the people who do, & will share theirs with me. I love that. We give to each other, we're each other's student, & teacher. That's equality. No holier than thou, thank God.Labels: denial, learning, message
posted by sharonsjourney @ 3:04 PM
4 Comments:
Ah yes, the wonderful disease of 'denial'! I could very much relate to your words today. It is hard to carry the message to those who cannot hear or see, but I think, our greatest message is by staying clean and sober ourselves!
Lots of people have silently caried their message to me this way...I wanted what THEY had, and one day at a time, I will get there too!
HUGS
"an open mind... saves me a lot of anguish"
ain't that the truth, Sharon.
alcoholism feeds off the ego in an insidious way, doesn't it?
a friend of mine an I had a conversation about art - it's a pretty self-centered life to be an artist. art by it's nature is showing the world YOUR view point. an artist's life can easily become a self-absorbed life, can't it?
hmmm... and then all the drunks I know are pretty creative people. artists or potential artists all of them.
maybe there is something to that? Is the Devil twisting a common eccentricity to trip us up?
hmmm...
At any rate - great post. obviously addiction is a disease that involves our selfishness and ego, and it's a pain in the ass to keep it in check. but it's well worth the effort for everybody.
Hi Sharon,
I'm in a Cyber Cafe now coz my computer was struck down by lightning last Friday's night (my time). I don't want to go to a friend's house just to use their computer nor do I have the time to visit Cyber Cafe. Furthermore, it's in a dial-up version and it took ages to load anything. I don't know when I shall be up again. Maybe a week. How do you spent a week without your beloved computer?
Ego is my greatest obstacle ALWAYS. I have to constantly check my motives, or it can isolate me in so many ways. Yes we are all students and teachers..thats the miracle. Great post.
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