FELLOW TRAVELER

CODEPENDENCY............

I'm working thru my codenpendency. It's hard to say no to people, & people think I'm nice, then I feel guilty, cause yes, I am nice, but I'm not THAT nice. And I'm not being real. I've been in codependent relationships, & got so sick, as sick as I was in my alcoholism, & I hit bottom. Codependency hurts. I hate it when I see it in other people too, I can get judgemental, & angry, cause I see it in myself. Whether they work on theirs is none of my business, I just have to work thru mine. I'm working thru other issues too, & I'm back at step one again, let's face it, I'm powerless. Not over my actions tho, & I can change my thots, I can do something about alot of things, but some things I just can't, it's up to God. That's good to know, it makes life easier, & much simpler. I don't have to feel guilty, because I am doing the work, I'm working hard. We all have ups & downs, recovery is not a straight line upward. But I learn from the downs, I learn from the mistakes. I'm not going to apolojize for my feelings, I don't like perfect people, they trigger the feelings of less than. That's all I'm going to say about that. Is that childish? Well, I'll be 2 yrs. old next month. But that's no excuse hu? I'm going to stop now, I'm starting to ramble.

posted by sharonsjourney @ 7:38 PM