FELLOW TRAVELER

MY MOM

November is coming up, that is the month my mom died, 3 yrs. ago. It doesn't seem like that long. I think about her alot & get mad at God. She was supposed to live another 10 yrs. I just keep thinking it was a mistake, it was so sudden. She hadn't been feeling well for a long time, but cancer? No way! She died 6 wks. after she was diagnosed. I'm just glad she wasn't in horrific pain. Her spirit visits me often sometimes in dreams, or during the day. She was one of a kind. She was witty, she had a sweet adventurous spirit. She was always there for her kids, always. She supported me in all my big dreams, & efforts. I learned so much from her.

I have a friend who's mom is dying, I can be there for her, because of my experience. But it sure brings back the pain & shock I felt when I learned of my mom. I still have a hard time believing she's gone. I keep expecting it to be her when the phone rings, or I'll think I'm going to call her. I'm afraid I took her love for granted, I don't ever want to do that with my sister. She's the only one left. Our dad, only sibling, our brother, & now our mom is gone. I feel really lonely at times, I miss them all. But my mom is the biggest loss. There are things I didn't have a chance to make up to her, but I know she knows, & forgives me. She did so many imes. I miss you mom.

posted by sharonsjourney @ 8:23 AM